THE DETECTIVES OF THE 9TH PRECINCT
“WEDDING BELLS AND SHOTGUN SHELLS”
A FEW DAYS LATER NEAL’S APARTMENT:
“Hey Steve I got a bucket of chicken for dinner!” Neal replies as he opens the front door and he comes into the apartment. “Steve! Steve are you okay?” Neal replies as he heads towards Joey’s bedroom but before he gets there Stacy opens the door to the bathroom wrapped in just a towel.
“Hi Neal.” Stacy replies.
“Oh hey hi Stacy….” Neal replies slowly as he catches a glimpse of the towel. “Where’s the other half of that equation?” Neal asks as he gestures.
“Stacy who is it?” Neal hears Steve ask from the inside of the bathroom.
“Who is it Steve?” Neal asks.
Steve appears at the bathroom door behind Stacy. “Oh hey!” Steve replies as he waves with a silly grin on his face.
“Hey yourself!” Neal replies as he waves back.
“What cha doing here?” Steve asks.
“Steve….I live here.”
“Oh I know! I mean I know that….it’s just that your home….early.” Steve points out.
“So this is what you’re doing while I’m out slaving away getting my ass shot at.” Neal replies.
“Oh no your ass was shot at today?!” Stacy asks as she covers her mouth.
“No Stacy it’s a figure of speech. So….what are you kids up to today?” Neal replies.
“I’m helping Steve of course!” Stacy replies.
“Oh of course! Helping him do what exactly?” Neal asks.
“You know help him to take a shower of course! Steve told me that his doctor won’t let him take a shower by himself….he is in so much pain poor baby that he can’t do a thing for himself!!” Stacy replies
Above Stacy’s head Steve brings his finger up to his lips to make sure Neal keeps his mouth shut.
“Oh yeah poor baby. So Steve you’re in pain huh?”
“Oh yeah man excruciating.” Steve replies as he nods his head.
“It so bad that he has a hard time when we….” Stacy replies but is interrupted by Neal.
Neal raises his hand to stop her. “That’s alright Stacy I get the message.”
“Stacy honey I want to talk to Neal for a sec so jump in the shower and I’ll join you okay?”
“Don’t be too long.” Stacy replies as she gives him a long and lingering kiss.
“I won’t.” Steve replies after he comes up for air then he leaves the bathroom shutting the door behind him.
“Doctor’s orders Steve?” Neal replies.
“Ssshhh! She helps me wash my hair I have a hard time lifting my arms.” Steve replies.
“Sure. So ah what do you want to talk to me about?” Neal asks.
“You got the house!!!! Our first house aren’t you excited!!”
“I got the house?! Oh my god!!” Neal replies.
“They want you to come by tomorrow and sign the papers!”
“Okay, okay tomorrow! Wow Steve you know it’s kinda scary, first I’m engaged and now I am a homeowner what could happen next?”
“Well….that is what I really wanted to talk to you about.” Steve replies.
“Steve I don’t like that tone it doesn’t sound good.” Neal replies.
“It’s not that bad.”
“Well what is it?” Neal asks worried.
“See it’s like this….”
“Like what?” Neal asks.
“Steve!!!” Neal yells.
Steve takes a deep breath. “Floyd came by.”
“What?” Neal asks stunned.
Neal waves his hands back and forth. “I heard you the first time! Floyd came by….here?” Neal replies as he points to the floor. “How did he know where I live?”
Steve shrugs. “I….I don’t know maybe he followed you home one day or something.”
“Now when you said that he came by you meant you saw him drive by, right?”
“Ah no.” Steve replies as he shakes his head.
“He was here! In this apartment?” Neal asks.
“Well yeah I mean Stacy let him in before I could stop her and he had a beer….”
“You gave that wing nut one of my beers!!” Neal asks loudly.
“I….yeah well….Neal he seems to be a nice guy.” Steve replies as he shrugs.
“A nice guy? Alright Steve what did he want?” Neal asks as he rubs his forehead.
“He really didn’t say.”
“He didn’t say Steve? You let that….that lopsided wing nut in my apartment and you gave him one of my beers and he didn’t say what he wanted?”
“He just wants you to meet him at the park on 5th at .” Steve replies.
“Why for a frigging picnic?”
“Neal he didn’t say he just wants to meet you and that’s all he said.”
“Stevie baby what are you doing?” Stacy asks from the open bathroom door.
“I have to go time for my shower.” Steve replies happily.
“Don’t use all the hot water!!!” Neal yells after him.
“I promise!” Steve replies as he shuts the door.
“And don’t have sex in my shower!!!!” Neal yells again.
Steve quickly opens the door. “I can’t promise that!!” Steve closes the door even quicker.
Neal grabs the bucket of chicken and he heads in the direction of the balcony.
“Well Colonel it looks like it’s just you and me!”
STELLAR PARK THAT SAME DAY:
Neal parks the car at the curb and he walks around the park looking for Floyd. He takes the jogging path and after ten minutes when there is no sight of him Neal decides to leave.
Neal turns at the sound of his name to find Floyd standing there.
“Floyd what are we doing out here?”
“I am here about Ruby.” Floyd replies.
“Ruby? Ah come on Floyd!”
Right then and there Floyd walks up to Neal and he slaps him in the face with a glove.
“I challenge you to a duel!!!”
Neal stands there a minute and he tries not to laugh but he can’t help himself.
“A duel? Floyd not only are you a wing nut but you are a cracked wing nut!!! I am not fighting a duel with you that is just crazy!”
“I love Ruby and I am bound and determined to fight for her honor pistols at thirty paces.” Floyd replies as he opens the lid of the box he had been carrying to show Neal a pair of true dueling pistols.
“Wow Floyd are those real?”
“Of course they are! They are my grandfathers so shall we start?” Floyd replies seriously.
“Floyd I am not and I repeat I am not fighting a duel with you.”
“Well it is obvious to me that you are not the man for Ruby!! You know nothing of honor and true love! No you are not a man at all!!! Floyd replies.
“Now look Floyd….”
“Does she know about….him?” Floyd asks.
Neal looks around. “Him whom?”
“Ruby is a good, strong Southern woman and that sort of thing is not done where we come from!!! You ought to be ashamed of yourself toying with Ruby’s affections!!!! No you are certainly not a man!!!!”
“Floyd!!! Back the truck up man I am still stuck on the him whom thing! Him whom???!!!!”
“You know who! That….that boy I saw at your apartment, the one with the long hair!!! You’re….your boyfriend!!! Does Ruby know about him?”
“Boy? Oh shit you mean Steve!!!! Steve isn’t a boy he is older than I am and he’s not my boyfriend….he’s my partner!!!”
“Oh I see so they call them partners out here? Does Ruby know about him?”
“Yes Floyd, Ruby knows about him and he is my best friend and he isn’t my partner in the way that you think! He is my partner because we work together Floyd and if that is all I’m going now!” Neal turns to leave.
“Yes turn tail and leave like the yellow lily livered coward and chicken that you are!!! Ruby is not worthy of you!!!!”
Neal doesn’t get far when he stops and he turns back around and he walks back towards him pointing a finger at him.
“You know Floyd you maybe right about Ruby not being worthy of me because she isn’t! Ever since I met her I have been shocked that she wants to be with me!! I am amazed that she loves me as much as she does and I would die for her!!! No one and I mean no one calls me a coward or a chicken and gets away with it, so give me that damn pistol!!!!”
Floyd opens the box and Neal takes out a pistol.
“You said thirty paces right?”
“Yes that’s right.” Floyd replies as he takes the other gun. “We stand back to back and then we walk thirty paces and at the end of thirty paces we both turn and fire.”
“Yeah Floyd I know.”
“And if I win I get Ruby?” Floyd replies.
Neal laughs. “Yeah right Floyd! All I can say is you better not miss because I’ll kick your ass!!! Let’s do this thing.”
They both turn with their backs to each other and on the count of three they both started off in opposite directions and at the end of thirty paces they both turned and fired….
THE 9TH PRECINCT SQUAD ROOM THE NEXT DAY:
“Well, well Detective Schon nice of you to grace us with your presence.” The Lieutenant replies.
“I know I’m late, I took Steve to the doctor and you knew about that yesterday.” Neal replies.
“Can I see you in my office please?”
“Lookit Carl you can see me right here, I’m in no mood for this today. I have a splitting headache….”
“Does the….shiner have anything to do with that?” The Lieutenant asks.
“Yeah probably so.” Neal replies.
“Did your partner do that?”
“No Steve didn’t do this.” Neal replies.
“Did you have a nice evening yesterday Detective?”
“Does this look like I had a nice evening yesterday, Lieutenant?” Neal asks.
“Detective Schon I was having a wonderful evening yesterday playing golf with the Chief….”
“I’m happy for you Carl.” Neal replies sarcastically.
“That is until the Chief’s windshield was broken Detective.”
Neal doesn’t say anything he just looks down at the desk.
“Nothing to say Detective well I am surprised. You don’t even want to know what broke the windshield.”
Neal shrugs. “A rock?”
“Try one of these.” The Lieutenant replies as he takes a bullet out of his pocket and he holds it up for Neal to see. “Detective was you in the park last night?”
Neal takes a deep breath as he nods. “Yeah I was.”
“Now do you want to come with me into my office Neal?”
“Sure.” Neal replies as he follows Carl into the office.
NEAL’S APARTMENT LATER THAT DAY:
Neal slowly closed the door to Joey’s bedroom but he still managed to wake Steve up.
“Hey yourself.” Steve replies as he rubs his eyes. “Is it five already?”
“Na it’s only about one in the afternoon.” Neal replies as he comes into the room and he helps Steve to sit up. “I didn’t mean to wake you up.”
“Thanks. It’s alright, so what are you doing home….uh oh you got in trouble….didn’t you?”
“Slightly.” Neal replies as he sits on the bed next to Steve. “That stupid duel thing was bad enough but what really sealed the deal was the shattering of the Chief’s windshield on his Cadillac.”
Steve laughs. “Oh don’t make me laugh it hurts my ribs.” Steve looks over at Neal. “Wait you’re serious.”
“Oh yeah as a heart attack but it wasn’t my bullet it was Floyd’s.”
“Well Neal if you hadn’t ducked we would be planning a funeral instead of a wedding.” Steve replies as he puts his hand on Neal’s shoulder.
“They were blanks.”
“Oh. So what did the Lieutenant do to you?” Steve asks.
“Well it could have been worst he gave me two days suspension.”
“Paid or unpaid?” Steve asks as he leans in.
“Paid. I also promise to pay for a new windshield.”
Steve whistles. “Pricey.”
“I know, how’s the ribs?”
“Still a little sore, how’s the eye?” Steve asks.
“Well we make a great pair, I know, I’ll be your eyes.” Steve replies.
“And I’ll be your ribs. If you feel up to it I came by to get you, I want you to come with me when I sign the papers for the house.”
“You want me to be there?” Steve asks.
“Sure I mean it was your idea, I have you to thank for my new mortgage.”
“Sure okay.” Steve replies excitedly.
“Then we’re go by get some boxes and then we go and get those egg rolls you like so much.”
“Cool! Just let me go and comb my hair.”
“Steve I want to leave in the next five minutes.” Steve replies.
“I said I was going to comb it not wash it!!” Steve replies as he turns and walks off.
A WEEK LATER THE 41ST DISTRICT ON PATROL:
“Ah Neal it’s a beautiful day! The sun in my face and the wind in my hair!”
Neal smiles as he watches him. “Happy to be out of the police station?”
“Oh yes its wonderful! I hate desk duty almost as much as I hate hospitals! Hey Neal look….” Steve nudges Neal.
Neal looks across the street to where Steve is pointing at the Church where the just married couple was making their way down the steps as a substantial crowd threw rice at them, then they got into the limo parked there.
“That will be you and Ruby in a couple of weeks, the bride was beautiful don’t you think so Neal? Neal?” Steve nudges him.
“What? Oh yeah, yeah wow look at that Limo! Man Ruby would look beautiful in that!”
“Well what’s stopping you?” Steve asks.
“A little thing called scratch, moolah, sawbucks in other words, money!! That has got to be a big chunk of change.”
Steve takes out his notepad. “Tell you what I’ll check into it for you.”
Steve looks up just in time to see a car drive by but this car stood out from the others and it caused Steve to start the car.
“Where are we going?” Neal asks.
“After that car.”
Neal looks around. “What car?”
Steve puts the car into gear as he pulls out into the street.
“That car.” Steve nods. “See that semi-rusty green Chevy?”
“Now see anything else?” Steve asks.
“Yeah.” Neal sits up a little straighter. “Now that is an interesting feature.”
“I’ll say, I wonder if that was a standard feature or one of those options that cost extra.” Steve replies.
Neal reaches for the mike. “Ocean this is Victor 7.”
“Go ahead Victor 7.” The dispatcher replies.
“I need Wants and Warrants on
“10-4. Wants and Warrants on a 1973 green Chevy Nova,
“10-4 Ocean and also check to see if anybody has reported a missing person because this car has a hand sticking out of the place where the left, rear tail light should be.” Neal replies as he looks over at Steve.
Silence on the radio for a minute then dispatch says, “Victor 7 please repeat last transmission, did you say there is a hand sticking out where the right rear tail light should be?”
“Actually Ocean I said the left rear tail light and yes I did say it is a hand.” Neal replies.
“10-4 Victor 7 do you require back-up at this time?” The dispatcher asks.
Steve glances over at Neal and he shakes his head. “No Ocean not at this time we’re going to just follow him and see where he goes.”
“10-4 Victor stand-by for the Wants and Warrants check.”
“I’ll say. Neal you know I think that person in the trunk is dead I haven’t see that hand move once, have you?”
“Come in Victor 7.” The dispatcher replies.
“Go ahead Ocean you have Victor 7.” Neal replies.
“The 1973 Green Chevy Nova is registered to Roger Clark, 1407 Elm, of this city. A bench warrant has been issued for failure to appear in Court on the charge of unpaid traffic citations.” The dispatcher replies.
“Nothing violent?” Neal asks.
“Negative Victor 7.”
“10-4 we’ll pick him up Ocean.” Neal replies.
“Hey Neal look at these two idiots!!” Steve replies as he points at the police cruiser that just passed them then fell in behind the green Chevy that they had been following.
“Hey!!! That’s our guy!!!!” Neal yells.
They watch in disbelief as the cruiser hits their lights and sirens and the Chevy then hit the gas and took off.
“Hey!!!!” Steve yells.
“Shit!!!” Neal replies as he puts the bubble light on the roof as Steve took off after the cruiser and as soon as he could and traffic would allow Steve gunned it and he pulled up along side the Cruiser.
“Hey!!! You two big lug heads this is our collar!!!” Neal yells.
“Yeah what in the hell are you guys doing?” Steve yells as he looks at them then he looks back at the road.
“Detectives we didn’t know this was yours! We didn’t even know you guys were cops!” One of the officers yells.
“What does this look like a neon gum drop!!?” Neal yells as he points to the bubble light on the roof.
“We saw the hand!!!” The other officer yells.
“No shit Sherlock! Now back off!!!!” Neal yells at them and instantly the police cruiser falls back and Steve takes their place.
Steve chases the car across the city for ten minutes dodging other cars and pedestrians until the Chevy Nova made a turn and he headed out of the city and straight in the direction of a new stretch of road they were building.
“Steve did you see that sign?” Neal asks.
“That sign back there the one that said ‘Under Construction Use Caution Flagman Ahead. ’”
“Nope didn’t see it.”
Obviously the driver of the Chevy didn’t see it either and the Flagman who was standing there jumped into a nearby ditch to get out of the way. The Chevy continued up the road and the driver of the Chevy looked back over his shoulder, thinking he had a great chance of getting away, that was until he heard the big truck horn blowing and when he turned his head back around that is when he saw the truck.
The driver of the Chevy turned sharply to the left ramming thru the barricades there and then Steve and Neal watched as the Chevy hit a pile of debris and became air born.
Steve tried to slow down but it wasn’t fast enough and Steve followed in the path of the Chevy, also becoming air born. They were both yelling as they watched the Chevy land in a fresh stretch of cement that was just poured.
“Oh shit!!!!!!” Steve yelled.
They landed right behind the Chevy in the same patch of cement the impact throwing Steve into Neal’s lap.
“Steve are you okay?” Neal asks.
“I think so! Holy crap look he’s running!!!!” Neal replies as he points.
As they soon found out it was more slipping and sliding than running because once the driver got out of the car and he set foot on the cement it was like maneuvering on ice and this time it wasn’t hard to catch up to him. Steve was able to make his way over to him and he grabbed him from behind, all three of them covered in cement.
“Alright scumbag hold it right there Oceanview Police!!” Steve yells at him.
“What did you do to the girl?” Neal asks.
“What girl? What in the hell are you talking about?” The man replies as they take him by both arms hauling him to his feet trying their best to slosh thru the cement to the Nova.
“The girl that’s in the trunk that’s who!” Steve replies.
“Yeah man don’t lie we saw her hand!” Neal replies.
“All of Oceanview saw her hand so tell us what you did to her!!!” Steve yells.
“I’m telling you guys there isn’t a girl in that trunk! Open it and find out.”
“Hey you over there….” Neal yells at one of the construction workers. “….grab the keys out of the ignition.”
The construction worker goes over and he takes the keys out of the ignition and he tosses them to Neal who unlocks the trunk and when he raises the lid they both stand there staring.
“See I told ya!!!!” The driver replies.
LATER IN THE LOCKER ROOM:
“Boy it’s a good thing those construction guys had that water hose, otherwise you and I would be cop statues!” Neal replies from inside the shower.
“What?” Steve turns off the blow dryer. “Did you say something?”
“I said it was a good thing those construction guys had that water hose.” Neal turns off the water. “Hey Steve hand me that towel.”
Steve grabs a towel off of the rod and he hands it to Neal who wraps it around his waist then he steps out of the shower then Neal grabs another towel to dry his hair.
“Here you two are.”
They both turn around to see the Captain standing there.
“Hey Cap welcome back!” Steve goes over and he shakes his hand.
“Hey Cap how was vacation?” Neal asks.
“It was good and relaxing but not as interesting as what you guys were doing from what I heard.” The Captain replies.
“Oh so you talked to the Lieutenant?” Neal asks.
“Oh yes he gave me quite an earful about you guys.” The Captain replies.
“Oh.” They both say as they look at the floor.
“Poor Carl doesn’t have a lot of hair left but what he did have left he told me that he pulled out over you guys.”
“Ah Cap we were just doing our jobs.” Steve replies.
“Yeah Cap I mean ever since he made Lieutenant he has gotten too big for his britches and he’s forgotten what it’s like to be on the streets.”
“Well guys I will admit that he has been known to be overzealous but he is a good police officer.” The Captain replies.
“Well Cap he wants your job.” Steve replies as he points at the Captain.
“Well for that he will have to wait at least ten years, I’m shooting for Chief myself someday. You know I missed reading your reports and I can’t wait to read this one.”
“Yeah Cap if it hadn’t been for those car jockeys things would have turned out differently.” Neal replies.
“Yeah Neal and I wouldn’t have been covered in cement, sorry about your car Neal I’ll fix it for you later.”
“That’s alright Steve and we thought we had a psycho killer on our hands….”
“Yeah Cap we didn’t know it was just a mannequin he had in the trunk.” Steve replies.
“Yeah who knew?” Neal replies as he shrugs.
“Well you two did a great job and Neal I hear that congratulations are in order.”
Neal smiles. “Yes sir.”
The Captain shakes his hand. “I hope I’m invited.”
“Yes sir there should be invitation in your mailbox as we speak. Captain, Steve here is my best man but I was wondering if you could do me a favor.”
“Of course Neal anything.”
“Go on Neal ask him.” Steve prompts.
“Well I was wondering Captain, you know I think of you as my father and I was wondering if you could, you know, stand up next to me, like a father would.”
“Yes Neal I would be honored.”
Steve wipes his eyes. “Ah that was sweet.”
“Now you two finished getting dressed and I’ll see you upstairs.” The Captain replies.
“Yes sir.” Neal replies.
“Yes sir we’ll be up there shortly.” Steve replies. “See I told you that he would do it.”
“Make sure you cross that off your wedding list and oh by the way the ring is ready, we’re go by and pick it up.”
“Great! Do you still want to play golf tomorrow afternoon?” Steve asks.
Neal thinks about it for a minute. “Sure why not!”
“Cool! I’ll see you upstairs partner.”
THE NEXT DAY AT THE OCEANVIEW COUNTRY CLUB:
“Wow Neal look at this place!”
“Yeah it is fancy. Are you sure that we’re dressed properly?” Neal asks.
“Yeah, yeah man this is what Lieutenant Michaels wears when he plays golf.”
“It just seems a little; oh I don’t know, weird!! Stripes and solids together?”
“It’s cool look everybody else is dressed this way.”
“Good afternoon gentleman.”
They both turn to see a lovely, young lady wearing a waitress uniform and holding a tray.
“Afternoon.” Steve replies as he smiles at her.
“Can I get you gentleman anything to drink?”
Steve looks at Neal as he shrugs. “We’re have two beers.” Neal replies.
“We have Domestic, Imported, dark or light.” The waitress replies.
“I….” Steve replies as he looks at Neal.
“Two domestic beers….”
“Light….” Steve replies.
“Thank you gentleman now may I see your membership cards?” The waitress asks.
Neal and Steve look at one another. “We don’t have membership’s cards.” Steve replies.
“You two aren’t members?” She asks.
“No.” Neal replies as he shakes his head.
“That is alright, just give me the name of the member that you are the guest of and we will start a tab for you.”
“Oh okay, Carl Michaels.” Steve replies.
“Thank you and I’ll be right back with your beers.” She replies then she walks off as Steve watches her walk away.
Neal taps him on the shoulder. “Steve.”
But Steve is still intent on the waitress’s behind so Neal taps harder. “Steve!!”
“What?” Steve replies.
“We aren’t Carl’s guests he doesn’t even know that we’re here.” Neal points out.
“Well it’s alright we’re pay for it.”
A few minutes later the waitress returns with their beers. “There you go.”
“Thank you.” Neal replies.
Steve looks at her nameplate. “Michelle where do we get golf clubs and things like that?”
Michelle smiles. “At the Pro shop, you can rent golf clubs and get a golf cart there.” Michelle replies as she points.
“Thank you, you have been very helpful.” Steve replies as he smiles at her.
“Anytime.” She turns and walks off.
“Wow she is cute! Neal after we finish our beers let’s go and check out the Pro shop.”
“You know Steve I think you’re right this golf stuff doesn’t look that hard.” Neal replies.
AN HOUR LATER:
“Sorry!” Steve yells. “Neal I think that guy is mad, uh oh here he comes!” Steve replies.
The man approaches them at a fast clip wielding a golf club.
“Hey you two big dummies!!! The green is that way!!!”
“Hey man we’re sorry!” Neal replies.
“Yeah man we didn’t mean any harm we’re new at this!” Steve replies.
“No shit!!! If I see one of your golf balls heading in my direction again I will personally return it to you, catch my drift?” The man replies as he points his golf club at them.
“Yeah man we get it.” Neal replies.
“Yeah we’re sorry.” Steve replies.
The man turns around mumbling to himself as he goes back down the hill.
“He wasn’t very nice was he Neal?” Steve asks.
“No he wasn’t but then again I can see his point, you missed the hole but you sure bounced it off that golf cart. Twice.” Neal replies.
Steve shrugs. “I am nothing but consistent.”
“What in the hell are you two guys doing here?”
They both turned in the direction of the voice behind them.
“Hey Carl.” Steve replies as he waves.
“Hey Carl.” Neal replies.
“I heard there were two guys out here causing trouble but I had no idea it was you two!!” Carl replies.
“Causing trouble?” Steve repeats.
“We’re not causing trouble we’re just playing golf!!” Neal replies.
“What was that about then?” Carl asks as he motions to the guy who was yelling at them earlier.
Steve looks back over his shoulder. “That? Oh that was just a slight misunderstanding.”
“Yeah man a slight misunderstanding.” Neal replies.
“How did you two get in here? This is a member’s only club.”
“We just walked in the front door like everybody else.” Neal replies.
“Yeah and if anybody said anything we just told them that we know you.”
“You told them that you know me?” Carl replies as he points to himself.
“Well yeah….” Steve replies. “….You know you’re pretty popular here all we did was mention your name and we got whatever we wanted.”
15 MINUTES LATER IN THE PARKING LOT:
“Where is that notebook?” Neal asks as he rummages thru the glove box.
“What notebook?” Steve asks as he watches Neal.
“Ah I found it!” Neal replies as he pulls it from the glove box then he opens it and he begins to write in it.
“What are you doing now?” Steve asks.
“Adding this to the list of places that we have been kicked out of, banned from, or just told to never come back to.” Neal replies as he writes.
“Ah Neal….” Steve replies.
“Don’t ah Neal me Steve look its two pages!” Neal replies.
“Not all of those were my fault!” Steve replies. “So what do we do now?”
“Well we haven’t been paged by dispatch so all the baddies must be behaving themselves what say we go over to that other golf course.”
“You mean the one Carl told us about, the city one?” Steve replies.
“Sure why not I mean I was having fun and it would be a shame to let these nice clothes go to waste.”
“Yeah okay and you know it’s a good thing that Carl is not our boss anymore because when he gets that bill for that tab he would have assigned us to the locker room!” Steve replies.
“Or suspended us indefinitely come on let’s go and shoot some birds!!” Neal replies.
“Neal I think it’s called shooting birdies.” Steve points out.
“Whatever it’s called let’s just go and do it!!”
“Tally ho!” Steve replies.
“Tally….tally ho?” Neal replies.
A WEEK BEFORE THE WEDDING:
“Steve!!” Neal yells as he rummages thru the drawers at Steve’s desk.
“What? Neal what are you doing get your hands out of my drawers!!!”
The other detectives in the squad room laugh.
“We always knew that you guys were funny!!!” One of them yell.
“Yeah, yeah Fred put a sock in it!!” Steve yells back. “What are you looking for?”
“The wedding notebook what else?”
“Neal I have it.” Steve pulls it out of his back pocket and he hands it to Neal.
Neal gives him a look then Neal opens it. “Steve what is today?”
Neal suddenly stands up. “Tuesday? Oh holy crap!” Neal looks at the clock. “Joey!!! Joey flies in today! Right now! I have to go to the airport!!! Why are you just standing there, come on we have to go!!!”
“Neal.” Steve crosses his arms over his chest. “Ruby is going to pick him up then she’s going to take him to get his suit.”
“Oh! Oh yeah I knew that I just wanted to see if you did.” Neal replies as he points at Steve.
“Neal calm down man.”
“I am calm; let’s see Mom flies in tomorrow.” Neal replies as he checks the calendar.
“And Ray will be here Thursday.”
“And Ruby’s folks will be here Friday.” Neal replies.
“We got our dress uniforms from the cleaners.” Steve replies.
“Check. You’re have the house ready right?”
“Oh sure no problemo, so Neal, your mom is she still single?”
Neal looks up at Steve. “Why?” Neal asks suspiciously.
Steve puts his hand on his chest. “Oh I’m not asking for myself even though your mom is a fox….”
“Did you just say that my mom is a fox?”
Steve puts his hand on his hip as he gestures with the other. “Well….yeah because she is.”
“Steve you do realize that this is my mother we’re talking about here and she is in her fifties….technically.”
“Ah fifties smithies! Age is just a number besides I appreciate older, foxy women. Neal just between you and me older women have taught me a lot….so is she still single.”
“But you’re not asking for yourself?” Neal replies.
“Oh no not for myself. You know my dad, Ray, well he’s going to be here and I told him that your mother was going to be here….”
“Yeah.” Neal replies.
“….And he thought that is if you didn’t mind….”
“Yeah.” Neal replies.
“….If he could take her out. You know for dinner, dancing, something like that.”
“So the wolf wants to take out the fox? Is that it?” Neal asks.
Steve scratches his head. “Are you saying that Ray, my father, is a wolf?”
“Steve your father, Ray, is a wolf and you are just like him! You are the wolf pup!!!”
“I am not a pup!!!” Steve hesitates a minute. “So is it okay if Ray takes her out?”
“He’ll have to ask her. Come on man let’s hit the road.”
1401 WOODCREST THURSDAY NIGHT:
“So Ray what do you think of the house?” Neal asks after the tour of the house.
“I like it and I think you and Ruby will be very happy here.” Ray replies.
“Joey what do you think of your room?” Steve asks as he holds him.
Joey raises his arms and he bounces up and down in Steve’s arms. “I like it a lot!!! Yeah!!! Daddy can I have a dog?” Joey asks as Steve’s laughs.
“You told him to do that didn’t you?” Neal asks.
“No I didn’t.” Steve says as he puts Joey down. “Joey remember what we told you this house is a secret so don’t tell Ruby.”
“Yes I promise I won’t! Uncle Steve are you going to keep me when Dad and Ruby go on their love trip?”
They all smile. “Yes Joey I will keep you and Ray will help too.” Steve replies.
“I’m going to stick around and help with the move.” Ray replies.
“You are well Ray thanks I appreciate that.” Neal replies.
“Yes it will be perfect when you return home with your new bride.” Ray replies as Neal smiles.
“Uncle Steve are you going to live here when you get a Mrs. Perry.” Joey asks.
They all laugh then Neal replies. “I sincerely hope not.”
Just then they were all surprised when the front door bell rang and they all looked at one another.
“Who is that?” Neal asks as he looks at Steve.
The bell rings again. “Daddy can I answer it?” Joey asks as he tugs on Neal’s hand.
Neal puts his hand on the top of his head. “No honey Steve and I will get it, Ray can you take him out to the back yard?”
“Sure. Come on Joey let’s go and find a place for that swing.” Ray says as he takes Joey by his hand and they go out the back door.
Neal puts his hand on his gun as Steve approaches the front door when Neal nods his head Steve grabs the door knob and he yanks the front door open then he reaches outside and he grabs whoever it was that rang the bell and he pulls them roughly into the living room.
“What in the hell….?” Neal replies. “Floyd what are you doing here?”
“Yeah Floyd what in the blue blazes are you doing here?” Steve asks as he lets him go.
Floyd readjusts his jacket.
“How did you find out where I live or where I’m going to live?” Neal asks.
“Yeah Floyd?” Steve asks.
“I followed you of course! Some detectives you are you didn’t even know I was behind you!” Floyd replies as he comes further into the living room. “So….this is the house you bought together?”
Neal looks at Steve. “No Floyd we didn’t buy this house together I bought this house.”
“So….this is the house you bought for my Ruby.”
Neal rubs his eyes. “No Floyd this is the house I bought for my Ruby.”
At that moment Joey runs into the house and straight to Neal. “Daddy look I found a frog!!”
“Sorry Neal I couldn’t keep him outside.” Ray replies as he follows behind.
“That is alright. Ray this is Floyd.” Neal replies.
They shake hands and Floyd looks back at Steve then he looks back at Ray. “Your Neal’s boyfriend’s father?”
Steve scratches his head.
“Boyfriend?” Ray asks. “Who are you talking about?”
Steve raises his hand. “He means me pop.”
Joey tugs on Neal’s hand. “Daddy is Uncle Steve your boyfriend?”
Neal looks down at him. “Floyd this is my son Joey.”
“My son is not his boyfriend they are best friends and partners!” Ray replies.
“Oh I forgot they call them partners out here.” Floyd replies. “Handsome little boy.”
“Thank you.” Neal replies.
“Excuse me but who are you?” Ray asks.
“I’m Ruby’s husband.” Floyd replies.
“What?” Ray exclaims as he looks at Neal.
“No he isn’t!” Neal replies.
“But I thought you and Ruby were getting married.” Ray replies as he looks at Neal.
“We are getting married and he isn’t Ruby’s husband.” Neal replies.
“Have you ever heard of the word bigamy?” Floyd replies.
“What?” Neal replies.
“Daddy what does bigamy mean?” Joey asks as he looks up at Neal.
“Hey Joey big guy why don’t we take your frog and we go and get some ice cream?” Steve replies.
“Uncle Steve I don’t think frogs like ice cream.” Joey replies.
“Right, but you do.” Steve replies.
“Yeah I love ice cream!!” Joey replies.
“Alright let’s go!” Steve replies as he takes him by the hand.
“Steve make sure that he washes his hands.” Neal points out.
“No problemo!” Steve says as he opens the front door and he leads Joey outside.
“Ray just so you know this Floyd here and Ruby are divorced….” Neal replies.
“She divorced me I didn’t divorce her! I still love her!” Floyd replies.
“Anyway Ray they are divorced….” Neal replies.
“Did you mention the duel?” Floyd asks.
Ray’s mouth opens as he looks at Neal. “Duel? You aren’t Portuguese by chance are you Floyd? You two had a duel?”
“Yes we had a duel but we both missed and I kicked Floyd’s ass, didn’t I Floyd?” Neal replies.
“Yes….yes he did I must admit that old Neal here is a good fighter.”
“Floyd why are you here?” Neal asks.
“I have come to a decision.” Floyd replies.
“And that would be what Floyd?” Neal asks.
“I have decided that you have won and as of tomorrow I will be going back home I realize now that Ruby will be in good hands. You do you love my Ruby don’t you Neal.”
Neal looks over at Ray then he looks back to Floyd. “Yes Floyd I love my Ruby with all my heart and soul, she is everything I could ever want.”
Floyd takes a deep breath. “Alright then I must be on my way. I wish you all the best and tell your boyfriend I said goodbye.” Floyd replies as he crosses the living room to the front door. “Nice to meet you Roy.”
“Ray.” Ray replies.
“Ray. Goodnight.” Floyd then opens the front door and he leaves.
“Neal that was certainly strange.”
“Well Ray Steve and I are surrounded by strange people
and he isn’t even from
“I will say that whenever I visit here I am not bored. Neal….”
“Yeah Ray?” Neal replies.
“So Neal your mother is still single?” Ray asks.
“Yes Ray she is still single.”
“Would it be alright with you if I asked her out?” Ray asks.
“Ray you will have to ask her that yourself if she is alright with it then I am alright with it.”
Ray pats Neal on the back. “That is fine I’m going to ask her out for tomorrow night!”
“Wow that is fast. So Ray….”
“Where are you planning are taking her? Dinner, dancing, movies?” Neal asks.
“Dinner and dancing on Friday then the movies on Saturday night.” Ray replies.
“Wait Friday and Saturday night….dates?” Neal replies.
“Neal your mother is a foxy woman!”
“So I’ll been told.” Neal replies.
“Come on let’s get this measuring done.”
“So Ray tell me again about the plans for your dates with my mother.” Neal replies.
MONDAY THE WEEK OF THE WEDDING:
“Okay Neal here’s my big suitcase.” Steve replies as he goes into Neal’s apartment.
“Thanks.” Neal replies as he takes the suitcase and he carries into the bedroom.
“Mom took him to the park; she just loves that little boy to death.” Neal replies.
“How was the dinner with the in-laws?” Steve asks.
“Good, Ruby’s family are some great, southern people. Her father and I smoked cigars and drank Brandy and her mother is just like her, beautiful and smart.”
“So how are you holding up?” Steve asks.
“Honestly? I’m a nervous wreck! This wedding stuff is hard work!” Neal replies.
“Here Neal take these pants.” Steve replies as he hands Neal a pair of pants. “How is Ruby holding up?”
“She told me she will be glad when all of this is over too! I actually got to be alone with her for a good twenty minutes, I will be glad when we leave on that honeymoon, I need a vacation after all of this.”
“Well you know you two kids shouldn’t just elope.” Steve replies.
Neal shrugs. “Don’t think we didn’t talk about that but we both want something we can remember for the rest of our lives. So….”
“When I get married I know exactly the kind of wedding I want.” Steve replies.
“What kind is that?” Neal asks.
“A sunrise wedding on the beach, she’ll wear flowers in her hair and we’re both be in white.” Steve replies.
“Steve that sounds wonderful and when you get married we’ll make that happen for you.” Neal replies.
“Neal what’s wrong?” Steve asks.
“What? Nothing’s wrong? Why do you ask if anything is wrong?”
“Because you folded and refolded the same shirt five times now.” Steve points out.
“Here give me that shirt.” Steve says as he takes the shirt and he puts it in the suitcase. “You aren’t getting cold feet are you?”
“Oh no nothing like that I mean I waited so long for this….” Neal replies.
“Exactly sometimes when you get what you wanted it can make you scared and have second thoughts….”
“I’m just getting bad vibes that’s all.” Neal replies.
“Bad vibes? Ah come on Neal that’s the cop part of you talking. Bad vibes about what exactly?”
“The wedding day.” Neal replies as he looks at Steve.
“Ah Neal come on nothing bad is going to happen.” Steve replies as he puts his hand on Neal’s shoulder. “I do have something for you and Ruby.” Steve reaches into his pocket and he pulls out a business card and he hands it to Neal.
“Thanks Steve you shouldn’t have Ruby and I have always wanted a business card.”
Steve laughs. “Read it you smuck.”
“This card is from a Limo Company….Steve you didn’t! This Limo Company has got to be the most expensive one in Oceanview!”
“That Limo will pick Ruby up on her wedding day and take her to the church and then after it will take you two to the reception.” Steve replies.
Neal throws his arms around Steve and he hugs him patting him on the back. “Steve you went into debt for me and Ruby, you didn’t have to do that but I’m glad that you did!!! This is going to be great!!!”
“Well actually it didn’t cost a cent.” Steve replies as Neal slowly lets Steve go.
“Steve you didn’t do something did you?”
“It wasn’t me exactly.” Steve replies.
“Who was it exactly?”
“You know Stacy right?” Steve asks.
“You mean Stacy from the bathroom that Stacy?” Neal asks.
“That’s her; you know she dances at the Kitty Catt Club.”
“Yeah anyway….” Neal replies.
“Anyway….Saturday night while she was working she saw somebody that we both know in a really compromising position with one of the other dancers….a very married somebody.” Steve replies as he smiles.
“Who?” Neal asks.
“What?” Neal replies. “Our Carl? Lieutenant Carl Michaels was caught in a slap and tickle moment?!”
“With an exotic dancer?” Neal replies.
“Wow!! So how does that explain the Limo?” Neal asks.
“Well you know how old Carl is always bragging about how he can get anything for anybody well I told him that I wanted a Limo or….” Steve replies.
“Or I would tell his wife.” Steve replies as he smiles rocking back and forth on his heels.
“Steve! Holy Mary you can’t do that, that’s blackmail!!!” Neal exclaims.
“Okay, give me back the card and I’ll tell him that we changed our minds.” Steve replies as he puts his hand out.
“Let’s not be hasty. What if he tells?” Neal asks.
“He won’t tell.” Steve replies.
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because if he tells then he admits that he was at the club with the dancer and if his wife finds out….” Steve replies.
“Oh Steve you can be so evil!”
“I know isn’t it great?” Steve replies.
Steve turns to see Joey running towards him.
“Hey big guy.” Steve gets down on one knee to hug him.
“Grandma took me to the park!!” Joey says happily.
“I heard. Hey Ms. Schon.” Steve replies as he gets up to greet her.
“Steve? My you have certainly grown up and the picture Ray showed me does not do you justice! I can’t believe you are the same little boy that ran around the neighborhood with my little Neal.”
“Well Ms. Schon it has been a few years….” Steve replies as he smiles.
“Please call me Barbara.”
“Okay Barbara and you look really, really great.” Steve replies.
Barbara fluffs up her hair. “Oh do you think so? You are so sweet just like your father.”
“Excuse me….” Neal tries to interrupt.
“How was the date with Ray?” Steve asks.
“Oh both evenings were wonderful just wonderful.” Barbara replies.
“Pardon me….” Neal tries to interrupt again.
“If you’re going to be around after the wedding I would like to show you around the city….” Steve replies.
“Whoa! Hold the phone! You did not just ask my mother out with me standing here.” Neal finally replies.
“Daddy I’m hungry.” Joey replies as he tugs on Neal’s pants.
“Tell you what son Uncle Steve, you and I are going to go and get submarine sandwiches then we’re going to go and get haircuts for the wedding, we want to look spiffy.”
“Did you say haircuts?” Steve asks.
“Yes Steve I said haircuts.” Neal replies.
“I want my hair to be long like Uncle Steve’s.” Joey replies.
“Yeah man I want my hair to stay long period.” Steve replies.
“Okay I should have said trims; we are going to get our hair trimmed. Okay Joey go and wash your hands then we’re going to hit the streets! Go!!!” Neal replies as they watch Joey run off.
They follow Neal into the living room then Barbara leans over and she whispers. “I would love to have you show me the city Steve.”
“I heard that!” Neal replies.
THE NIGHT OF THE REHEARSAL DINNER:
“Ah! Caught you two!!!” Steve replies as opens the door to the kitchen to find Neal and Ruby in each other’s arms kissing.
“It’s alright we’re going to get married aren’t we?” Neal replies as he holds Ruby.
“Yes sugar we are.” Ruby replies as she smiles at him.
“Well I’ll be quick so you can get back to your smooching, some of your guests are going to be leaving and they want to say goodbye to the happy couple and Joey is asleep.” Steve replies.
“Joey has worked very hard today.” Ruby replies.
“Yeah sometimes I think that kid is more adult than child.” Neal replies.
“Yeah his dad is more child than adult!!!” Steve replies as he laughs.
Just then they are surprised to see the Captain appear behind Steve. “Boys….”
“Uh oh I have heard that tone before.” Steve replies.
“Yeah me too and it’s never good….we have to go don’t we?” Neal replies.
The Captain nods his head. “I’m afraid so guys, let’s go.” The Captain replies as he gestures.
Neal kisses Ruby. “I love you and I’ll see you at the wedding.”
“I love you too.” Ruby replies.
UNION HALL THIRTY MINUTES LATER:
“Are you sure this is the right place?” Neal asks as they get out of the car.
“Positive.” Steve replies.
“So is this a burglary or what?” Neal asks.
“Could be.” The Captain replies.
“Could be? Man it’s awfully dark maybe we should draw our weapons.” Neal replies.
“Won’t be necessary.” Steve replies.
The Captain opens the door and Neal stops and he looks in.
“Go on it’s alright.” Steve replies.
Neal reluctantly goes in followed by the Captain and Steve and when Steve comes in he flicks on the light switch and the place is lit up like Christmas. In the middle of the room is a very large cake and on cue a scantily clad Stacy pops out and then everybody else from the precinct comes out from their hiding places.
“Happy Bachelor Party!!!!” They all yell.
Neal just stands there with his mouth open as Steve puts his arm around him.
“Welcome to your bachelor party Neal!!!” Steve replies.
Somebody hands him a beer.
“Neal are you okay?” Steve asks.
Neal looks around. “I….I don’t know I’m in shock.”
“Well snap out of it man, tonight we party because tomorrow you wed.” Steve replies.
“Yeah! Yeah tomorrow I wed! Turn up that music and let’s party!!!” Neal yells as everybody cheers.
“Come on Stacy baby let’s dance!!!” Steve replies as he grabs Stacy.
NEAL’S AND RUBY’S WEDDING DAY:
“Neal hold still!” Steve replies as he tries to put eye drops in Neal’s eyes. Neal finally holds still and Steve is able to put the drops in his eyes. “There that will get rid of the red.”
Neal blinks. “Thanks. That was some party; it was nice of Stacy to bring her girlfriends along from the club. How do I look?”
Steve puts the hat on Neal’s head. “Beautiful.”
“I’m serious.” Neal replies.
“So am I you are beautiful I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in your dress uniform before.” Steve replies.
“Well I’ve never seen you in yours before either, we both look damn good.” Neal replies as they look in the mirror. “Steve….”
“I’m scared shitless. I’m scared I’m going to forget what I’m supposed to say, I’m scared that I am not good enough for her….”
“Neal if you forget what you’ll going to say just tell her that you love her and that you want to spend the rest of your life with her and Ruby is a lucky woman, she’s getting a great guy.” Steve puts his arm around him. “And if you chicken out I’ll marry her.” Steve says as they both look into the mirror.
Neal laughs as he hugs him. “Thanks Steve and I love you.”
“I love you too Neal now let me go your wrinkling the threads.”
“Oh my goodness you two look wonderful.” Neal’s mother replies as she holds Joey by his hand.
“Wow daddy!” Joey exclaims.
“Joey you look mighty handsome yourself! Give me five!!!” Steve says happily.
Joey gives Steve five.
“You three stand together I want to get a picture of this.” She replies.
Joey stands in front of Neal and Steve as they put their hands on his shoulders and she takes the picture.
“Barbara stand next to Neal and Joey and I’ll take a picture.” Steve replies.
Barbara hands him the camera as she takes her place next to Neal then she leans over and kisses him. “My little boy is getting married.”
“Ah mom!!” Neal replies as Steve takes the picture.
“Perfect! Come on Joey I want one of you by yourself.”
Joey stands still holding the pillow that the rings are going to rest on then Steve takes the picture.
“Alright Joey you remember what you have to do right?” Neal asks.
Joey nods. “I carry the rings up the aisle and then I give them to Uncle Steve and I have to be careful not to drop them!!”
They all laugh. “That’s my boy!” Neal replies.
“Neal I want you and Steve to salute!” Barbara replies.
“Mom we aren’t the Marines we’re cops!” Neal replies.
“Neal I am your mother and I want you to salute!!!” Barbara replies.
Neal and Steve look at one another and Steve shrugs. “She’s right Neal.”
They stand up straighter then they bring their hands up to the brim of their hats looking very serious.
“Perfect!” Barbara replies as she takes the picture.
Then the Captain comes into the room. “Hello Barbara you look beautiful.”
“Thank you all of you look so wonderful….quick go stand over there so I can take a picture.” Barbara motions and they all stand together then she takes the picture.
“Alright fellas it’s time to take our places.” The Captain replies.
“It’s….time?” Neal asks.
“Yes it’s time.” The Captain replies.
“It’s time Steve.” Neal replies.
“Yes Neal it’s time so after you.” Steve replies as he gestures.
“Help me.” Neal puts out his arm and Steve takes it Neal then takes a deep breath. “Alright let’s do this thing.”
Steve, Neal and the Captain all take their places in front of Father Allen and they listen as the Wedding March begins and then they see the doors open and they see the flower girl walking up the aisle leaving rose petals and close behind her is Joey. Neal and Steve both smile when they see him and he takes his place next to Steve.
Then the guests gasp loudly when Ruby, holding onto her father’s arm, appears at the door and Neal smiles at her as they start down the aisle. Ruby is a beautiful woman but now to Neal she is an angel walking towards him wearing her long white dress with her veil and he feels his eyes start to tear. Next to him Steve wipes his own eyes as Ruby and her father close the distance and then Ruby’s father places her hand into Neal’s.
“Be good to her son.” Her father whispers to Neal.
“I will sir I promise.”
Neal takes her hand and wraps it around his arm as they stand next to each other in front of the priest.
“Please face each other.” Father Allen instructs Ruby and Neal.
They hold hands as they face each other smiling.
“We are gathered here surrounded by family and friends and in the eyes of God to join Ruby Elizabeth Thornhill and Neal Joseph Schon in holy matrimony and if any of you here have any objections to this union, speak now, or forever hold your peace….”
They all wait and just before Father Allen speaks again….
A loud gasp runs thru the crowd as they turn in their seats to see who had spoken and Neal, Ruby, Steve, the Captain, the bride maids and even Father Allen have their mouths drop open in surprise.
Neal looks to see who had spoken and in many ways he wasn’t surprised. “Floyd! What in the hell are you doing here?” Neal yells. “I thought you told me you were going back home!”
“I changed my mind!!!” Floyd yells back.
“Floyd J. Wilkins what are you doing!!!!!” Ruby yells at him.
“Ruby I’ve never stopped loving you!!!” Floyd yells.
“Floyd it’s been over for years I’m going to marry Neal!!” Ruby yells at him.
“Over my dead body!!!!” Floyd yells back.
“That….can be arranged.” A voice says then a shot rings out and Floyd falls to the floor and then the guests start to scream as they either hit the floor behind the pews or they try and make their way to the doors.
Neal grabs Ruby and Steve grabs Joey just as another shot takes the camera out of the photographer’s hands and then another shot cuts a candle in two.
“Go!” “Go!” Neal yells as they head for the place behind the altar. “Ruby are you alright?” Neal asks as they make it behind the altar.
“Yes I think so who is that?” Ruby asks.
“I don’t know, Cap are you okay?” Neal asks.
“I think so.” The Captain replies.
Neal and Steve both remove their uniform coats and hats. “Joey are you okay son?” Steve asks him as Joey looks at Steve wide-eyed and all he can do is nod. “Joey you take care of Ruby okay?”
Joey nods as Ruby takes him in her arms.
“Father?” Neal asks Father Allen who is taking refuge with them.
“Steve remember I told you I had a bad feeling?”
“Well this is it!” Neal replies as a couple of bullets fly over their heads.
“Who is that guy?” Steve asks.
“Why are you asking me? It could be one of a thousand, pissed off felons! I told you some of them could read!!” Neal replies.
Everybody ducks as more wedding decorations are tore apart by bullets.
“So what do we do now Butch?” Steve asks.
“Why are you asking me Sundance?” Neal yells back.
“It was a beautiful ceremony sorry I had to interrupt it!!!” The man with the gun says as he laughs.
Neal and Steve look at one another. “Who is that?” Steve asks again.
Neal shrugs. “Okay man we give who is this?”
For his answer another shot is fired.
“How are the ribs there pip squeak?” The man yells back as he laughs.
Steve and Neal look at one another. “It’s the jolly green giant!!! How in the hell did he get out of jail?” Steve asks.
“I don’t know! Hey man, cool it there are women and children back here!!!!” Neal yells.
All the man does is laugh as he takes a shot at the statue of Mary taking off part of her head.
“Hey you bozo!!!!” Father Allen yells.
“Steve do you have your gun?” Neal asks.
“No! Who brings a gun to a wedding?” Steve asks.
Another shot is fired. “He does!”
“Come out, come out wherever you are!!!” The man yells as he laughs.
“You know damn it this is my wedding and that guy is pissing me off!!! Does anybody have a gun?” Neal asks and everybody shakes their head but one of them raises his hand.
“Father Allen you have a gun?” Steve asks shocked.
The Priest shrugs. “It’s a bad neighborhood and sometimes I’m here by myself.”
“But I thought God was supposed to be our protector?” Steve asks.
“He is son but if they don’t believe in god they believe in that Smith & Wesson.”
More shots are heard as the gunmen shoots up the Church taking aim at the various statues and what wedding decorations he didn’t get earlier he gets now as he laughs.
“Come on out little chicken boy!!!”
Steve and Neal look at one another. “Is it loaded?” Neal asks.
“Of course.” Father Allen replies.
“Where is it?” Steve asks.
“In my office.” Father Allen replies.
“Please tell me it’s that door that is right behind us.” Neal replies.
“Yes that’s it.” Father Allen says.
“Is there another way out thru there?” Steve asks.
“Oh okay. Alright Father go and get us that gun and any ammo you have with it okay?” Neal replies. “Why don’t the rest of you go with him.”
“Daddy I’m scared.” Joey replies.
“So am I.” Ruby replies.
More shots are heard.
“Look you two I love you and I promise you nothing will happen to you. Do you believe me?” Neal asks.
They both nod their heads. Neal then kisses Ruby and then he kisses Joey.
“Okay you two follow Father Allen into his office now, you guys keep your heads down. Now go!”
“Be careful sugar.” Ruby replies.
They watch as Ruby and Joey follows Father Allen, on their hands and knees, into his office and a few minutes later Father Allen reappears with the gun and ammo.
“Thanks Father now go back to your office and lock the door.” Steve instructs.
“I’ll go with them and call it in.” The Captain replies.
They wait until the office door is closed then Neal hands the gun to Steve.
“You get the honors since he bruised your ribs.”
“Thank you. Where is he?” Steve asks.
“Let’s find out.” Neal grabs his hat and he tosses it sideways into the air and immediately the gunmen shreds it with a barrage of bullets.
“That corner.” Neal replies as he points.
“What’s the plan?”
“Plan G.” Neal replies.
“Plan G?” Steve repeats.
“Yeah Plan G.” Neal replies.
“Alright ready?” Steve asks.
“As I will ever be.” Neal replies.
Steve then stands up and Neal gets behind him putting his hands around his waist then Steve fires a volley of bullets at the gunman as they leave the safety of the altar, Neal crouched behind Steve using him as he fires as some sort of cover, running across the sanctuary to find a hiding place behind a pew. And it just happens to be the pew that Floyd fell down behind. Shots zing above their heads as Neal checks on Floyd.
“Is he dead?” Steve asks.
“No he’ll live he’s just out.” Neal replies.
Steve shoots back at the gunman then they hear a sound that sounds like a door opening Steve glances over the edge of the pew.
“Hey Neal he’s gone! He took off!”
At that Neal and Steve got to their feet and went after him and when they got to the stairs in front of the Church the gunman turned and fired at them which causes Steve and Neal to dive behind the stone pillars that were there.
“Are you alright?” Neal asks.
“Yeah man that was close!! Look Neal he’s getting in that car!!!”
“Oh shit why did it have to be that car!!!” Neal exclaims.
Steve helps Neal to his feet and they run to the loaner car Steve had gotten from the precinct and even before Steve had the passenger door closed all the way Neal starts the car and he hits the gas. Steve puts the bubble light on the roof of the car.
“Why did it have to be the limo?” Neal asks.
“Well that car is so big and bulky it can’t go very fast.”
Neal glances at the speedometer. “We’re at sixty already.”
“Wow well maybe I was wrong. Hey look I’ve got an idea.”
“I hate when you say that….what is it?” Neal asks
“Let’s head him off at the pass….turn right up here and we meet him up there….we cut him off and make him head for the docks.”
“That might just work…hang on!!” Neal replies.
At the next corner Neal hung a right then a left and he raced up the alley sending boxes and trash cans flying and when the alley met the street Neal rolled out right in front of the limo.
“Steve this better work!!!!” Neal yells as the limo rolls toward them.
At the very last minute with a squeal of brakes, the limo made a crazy turn to the left right in the direction of the docks and Neal continues to follow.
Neal follows the limo in between the warehouses, dodging cars and the workers changing shifts there to what in the distance seems to be a dead end.
“See Neal I told you look a dead end!!” Steve replies as he points.
“That isn’t a dead end!” Neal yells.
“What is it then?” Steve replies as he looks a little scared by the tone of Neal’s voice.
“It’s a ship….!!!!” Neal yells.
“A ship? That means we’re heading for the….”
They both yell at the same time as they watched the driver of the limo up ahead try in vain to put the brakes on and stop but it did no good, he was too close to the edge and Steve and Neal watched in horror as the limo became airborne flying out over the ocean.
Neal slammed on the brakes then he turn the steering sharply to the left sending the car careening into some crates that were stacked there causing them to fall around them stopping their likely descent into the ocean below. With the crates surrounding them they still managed to get out of the car and they made their way over to the edge of the dock to see the limo sinking with it’s rear end sticking out of the water.
“Help me!!! Help me!!! I can’t swim!!!” The gunman yells from the water.
“You can’t be serious!” Steve replies.
They look out over the water their hands covering their eyes from the sun to see the gunman, who was driving the limo, now struggling in the water, kicking and screaming.
“Help me!!!!” The gunman yells as he goes down.
“We can’t let him drown, it wouldn’t be right.” Neal replies.
“No I suppose not.” Steve replies.
“On the count of 3. 1….2….3!!!”
At the count of three they both jumped into the water close to where the gunman went down. A few seconds later they both surface, each of them holding onto one of the gunman’s arms as they drag him thru the water over to one of the piers. Neal climbs the ladder that is there, then the gunman then Steve, once on the pier the gunman coughs up the water trying to catch his breath.
“Neal lookit my watch still works!!!!” Steve replies happily as he shows Neal his watch.
“Well Steve that is wonderful! You know I think Carl is going to be pissed about the limo.” Neal replies.
“Think so?” Steve asks as they hear sirens in the distance signaling the approach of the cavalry. Steve kicks the gunman in the butt.
“We don’t even have handcuffs!” Neal points out.
“Oh that’s alright even if we did they wouldn’t fit him anyway and if he gives us a hard time before back-up gets here all we have to do is roll him back into the water!! Right Jerk-o?” Steve yells as he looks down at the gunman.
“I’ll be good I promise! No more water!!!” The gunman begs.
“Guess what you’re under arrest….again!!!” Neal replies.
“You have the right to remain silent….” Steve replies.
A WEEK LATER:
“Hey Cap look Neal sent us a postcard from
The Captain looks at the postcard. “Wish you were here. Somehow I doubt that he means that.”
“Yeah no kidding, you know Cap that was nice of Father Allen to perform the ceremony the next day at your house.” Steve replies.
“Well I know it wasn’t exactly the wedding Ruby had planned but it was still beautiful.” The Captain replies.
“I can’t believe that old Neal is married….” Steve replies.
“Excuse me.” A voice says from behind them.
They both turn to see Floyd standing there with his arm in a sling.
“Hey Floyd how’s the wing?” Steve asks.
Floyd puts his hand on his arm. “Mighty painful I must say but the doctor’s say it will heal….I’m on my way to the airport.”
“Oh going back home I see.” Steve replies.
“Yes and I just wanted to stop by and say thank you….” Floyd replies.
“For what?” Steve asks.
“Helping me get to the hospital and I want to apologize for interrupting the wedding.” Floyd replies.
Steve puts his hand on his shoulder. “Floyd you were following your heart and love will make you do crazy things and I’ll let you in on a little secret.”
“What?” Floyd replies.
“Neal and Ruby both forgive you and it’s not like you shot the place up like Harold Ramsey did.” Steve replies.
“Do people shoot at you all the time out here?” Floyd asks.
“Yes Floyd sometimes they do but usually not at weddings.” Steve replies.
“And I suppose I was wrong about you two, you aren’t that way….” Floyd replies as he gestures.
Steve shakes his head. “No Floyd we aren’t that way. Neal loves Ruby and I love Ruby….”
Floyd gets a look on his face. “Does Neal know you love Ruby?”
“Yeah Steve?” Floyd replies.
“Stop it.” Steve replies.
“Yes Floyd it is but remember a lot of people here are from someplace else sorta like….you Floyd.” Steve replies as he points at him.
“Oh. I must go now.” Floyd replies.
“I’ll walk with you downstairs.” Steve replies as he puts his hand on Floyd’s back.
“I met this beautiful woman at the wedding her name is Barbara….” Floyd replies.
“Barbara? Barbara Schon?” Steve replies.
“Yes that’s it!!” Floyd replies. “Do you know by chance if she is single?”
Steve shrugs. “I have no idea Floyd.”
“Did you say that her last name is Schon? Why does that name sound so familiar?”
Floyd replies as he scratches his head.
Steve shrugs. “Beats me man come on let’s go downstairs.”
“Now Neal this is what I call a handsome baby.” Steve replies as he looks at the picture.
“He is beautiful isn’t he?” Neal replies.
Steve smiles as he nudges Neal. “You can say that I was right it won’t hurt my feelings any.”
“Alright already you were right we did have a son.” Neal replies.
“Uh huh so what did you two name him?”
“Steve you know what we named him.” Neal replies.
“I know I just want to hear it again.” Steve replies.
“You mean you want to hear it for the twenty-fifth time today don’t you?”
“Whatever.” Steve replies.
“His name is Neal Stephens Schon Jr.” Neal replies.
“Ah yes I love it!!! Neal say it again.” Steve replies.
“Neal Stephens Schon Jr.”
“I am now immortal.” Steve replies.
“So what about when you have a son Steve?” Neal asks.
“His name will be Stephen Joseph Schon Perry Jr.”
“Stop it now.” Neal replies.
“No seriously.” Steve replies.
“What if you have a daughter?”
“Stephanie Josephine Schon Perry.” Steve replies.
“Steve when you have kids and they grow up they will sue you.” Neal replies.
“Those are good strong names. Neal here I got the baby a gift.” Steve replies as he hands Neal an envelope.
“Steve you already bought the baby so many things.” Neal replies as he takes the envelope.
“Call it Godfather’s privilege and I can spoil the little guy, go ahead and open it.”
Neal opens the envelope. “Steve a Savings Bond in his name, this is just too much.”
“Neal it is never too early to plan for the future and he can use it for school, I want him to go to College since I never did. You know you want your kids to do better than you did.” Steve replies.
“True and Steve you know I don’t think I want my kids to do this.”
“What do you mean by ‘this’?” Steve asks.
“This. What you and I do, being cops, I mean when Joey and Neal Jr. grow up who knows what the world will be like? There could be more crazy and dangerous people than ever.”
“Neal you and I both know we can’t live on what-ifs and it’s okay to worry and think about the future but right here and now….we have to live for today. Joey and Neal Jr. have many more years to grow up you know.”
“I know and having kids changes everything and Steve I’ve been thinking….”
“Becoming Lieutenant.” Neal looks at him.
“Oh well Lieutenant is basically an office job.” Steve replies.
“I know.” Neal replies.
“And it is safer.” Steve points out.
“Yeah it is that.” Neal replies.
“Well yeah” Neal replies.
“Neal if you want to do it I’ll stick by any decision you want to make….”
“Hey guys you got a shooting.” The Captain replies as he comes into their office and he puts the paper on the desk. “Oh a serious conversation I see….”
Neal and Steve look at one another. “No not really Cap….” Steve replies.
Neal reaches for the paper. “Yeah Cap nothing two Sergeants can’t handle. Let’s roll Steve.”
“You got it….Sergeant Schon.” Steve replies as he smiles.
©LAB and SRP & JRNY FANFICTION 2007 to 2008. All rights reserved. Steve Perry and Neal Schon’s likenesses appear only as characters. Any resemblance to any one living or dead is purely a coincidence. This fictional story is for entertainment purposes only and for the complete enjoyment of the author and the readers. I have no permission from Steve Perry or/and the members of Journey to use their likenesses or names and this story is purely fiction and written solely for the love of things and people back in the day. No real rock stars were injured in the writing of these stories and I put them back when I am finish with them.